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Happiness: Children & Teens

A guide to happiness, including information on the brain, religion, economics, environment, gratitude, children, and more.

Internet Resources

What Makes Kids Happy?

Parents can't make their children happy - what they can do is help them develop the skills and attitudes that contribute to happiness. Gain strategies for guiding and supporting kids in building a life that incorporates pleasure, engagement, and meaning, from teaching them how to relish positive experiences to helping them break free from perfectionism.

Source: Kanopy

Perspectives

The Happiest Kids in the World

Discover how Dutch parents raise The Happiest Kids in the World! Calling all stressed-out parents: Relax! Imagine a place where young children play unsupervised, don't do homework, have few scheduled "activities" . . . and rank #1 worldwide in happiness and education. It's not a fantasy--it's the Netherlands! Rina Mae Acosta and Michele Hutchison--an American and a Brit, both married to Dutchmen and raising their kids in the Netherlands--report back on what makes Dutch kids so happy and well adjusted. Is it that dads take workdays off to help out? Chocolate sprinkles for breakfast? Bicycling everywhere? Whatever the secret, entire Dutch families reap the benefits, from babies (who sleep 15 hours a day) to parents (who enjoy a work-life balance most Americans only dream of). As Acosta and Hutchison borrow ever-more wisdom from their Dutch neighbors, this much becomes clear: Sometimes the best thing we can do as parents is . . . less!

The Orchid and the Dandelion

"Based on groundbreaking research that has the power to change the lives of countless children--and the adults who love them." --Susan Cain, author of Quiet: The Power of Introverts. A book that offers hope and a pathway to success for parents, teachers, psychologists, and child development experts coping with difficult children.      In Tom Boyce's extraordinary new book, he explores the "dandelion" child (hardy, resilient, healthy), able to survive and flourish under most circumstances, and the "orchid" child (sensitive, susceptible, fragile), who, given the right support, can thrive as much as, if not more than, other children.      Boyce writes of his pathfinding research as a developmental pediatrician working with troubled children in child-development research for almost four decades, and explores his major discovery that reveals how genetic make-up and environment shape behavior. He writes that certain variant genes can increase a person's susceptibility to depression, anxiety, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, and antisocial, sociopathic, or violent behaviors. But rather than seeing this "risk" gene as a liability, Boyce, through his daring research, has recast the way we think of human frailty, and has shown that while these "bad" genes can create problems, they can also, in the right setting and the right environment, result in producing children who not only do better than before but far exceed their peers. Orchid children, Boyce makes clear, are not failed dandelions; they are a different category of child, with special sensitivities and strengths, and need to be nurtured and taught in special ways. And in The Orchid and the Dandelion, Boyce shows us how to understand these children for their unique sensibilities, their considerable challenges, their remarkable gifts.

Screens and Teens

If you feel like you're losing your teen to technology, you're not alone. Screen time is rapidly replacing family time, and for teens especially, it is hardwiring the way they connect with their world.  In Screens and Teens, Dr. Kathy helps you make sense of all this and empowers you to respond. She: Exposes the lies that technology can teach your teen Guides you in countering those lies with biblical truths and helpful practices Shares success stories of families who have cut back on technology and prioritized each other Kathy's research, experience, and relatability all come together for an inspiring book, sure to help you be closer with your kids. "Dr. Kathy continues to inform and inspire me with Screens and Teens. I feel better equipped to parent my kids in our constantly changing world because of her wisdom. Dr. Kathy's expertise makes her my "go-to" person when I have questions about technology and the way it affects our family. Whether you have kids or not, this book will make you more aware of the tech-driven world we live in and encourage you to make bold, smart choices." -Kirk Cameron, Actor/Producer Grab a pen and get ready to underline, circle, and write "That's so us!" in the margins. Be equipped to keep your family connected. BONUS: Every book includes an access code to stream or download a powerful 9-session video series (valued at $20) for FREE! In these videos, Dr. Kathy presents eye-opening insights to help you connect with your teen in a whole new way. Designed to be watched prior to reading each chapter, they will help you to engage the book on a deeper level.

Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother

An awe-inspiring, often hilarious, and unerringly honest story of one mother's exercise in extreme parenting, revealing the rewards-and the costs-of raising her children the Chinese way. All decent parents want to do what's best for their children. What Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother reveals is that the Chinese just have a totally different idea of how to do that. Western parents try to respect their children's individuality, encouraging them to pursue their true passions and providing a nurturing environment. The Chinese believe that the best way to protect your children is by preparing them for the future and arming them with skills, strong work habits, and inner confidence. Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother chronicles Chua's iron-willed decision to raise her daughters, Sophia and Lulu, her way-the Chinese way-and the remarkable results her choice inspires. Here are some things Amy Chua would never allow her daughters to do: ? have a playdate ? be in a school play ? complain about not being in a school play ? not be the #1 student in every subject except gym and drama ? play any instrument other than the piano or violin ? not play the piano or violin The truth is Lulu and Sophia would never have had time for a playdate. They were too busy practicing their instruments (two to three hours a day and double sessions on the weekend) and perfecting their Mandarin. Of course no one is perfect, including Chua herself. Witness this scene: "According to Sophia, here are three things I actually said to her at the piano as I supervised her practicing: 1. Oh my God, you're just getting worse and worse. 2. I'm going to count to three, then I want musicality. 3. If the next time's not PERFECT, I'm going to take all your stuffed animals and burn them!" But Chua demands as much of herself as she does of her daughters. And in her sacrifices-the exacting attention spent studying her daughters' performances, the office hours lost shuttling the girls to lessons-the depth of her love for her children becomes clear. Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother is an eye-opening exploration of the differences in Eastern and Western parenting- and the lessons parents and children everywhere teach one another.

Emerging Adulthood

In recent decades, the lives of people in their late teens and twenties have changed so dramatically that a new stage of life has developed. In his provocative work, Jeffrey Jensen Arnett has identified the period of emerging adulthood as distinct from both the adolescence that precedes it andthe young adulthood that comes in its wake. Arnett's new paradigm has received a surge of scholarly attention due to his book that launched the field, Emerging Adulthood.On the 10th Anniversary of the publication of his groundbreaking work, the second edition of Emerging Adulthood fully updates and expands Arnett's findings and includes brand new chapters on media use, social class issues, and the distinctive problems of this life stage. In spite of the challengesthey face, Arnett explains that emerging adults are particularly skilled at maintaining contradictory emotions - they are confident while being wary, and optimistic in the face of large degrees of uncertainty. Merging stories from the lives of emerging adults themselves with decades of research,Arnett covers a wide range of topics, including love and sex, relationships with parents, experiences at college and work, and views of what it means to be an adult. He also refutes many of the negative stereotypes about emerging adults today, finding that they are not "lazy" but remarkablyhard-working in most cases, and not "selfish" but rather concerned with making a contribution to improving the world. As the nature of American youth and the meaning of adulthood further evolve, Emerging Adulthood will continue to be essential reading for understanding the face of modernAmerica.

IGen

A highly readable and entertaining first look at how today's members of iGen--the children, teens, and young adults born in the mid-1990s and later--are vastly different from their Millennial predecessors, and from any other generation, from the renowned psychologist and author of Generation Me. With generational divides wider than ever, parents, educators, and employers have an urgent need to understand today's rising generation of teens and young adults. Born in the mid-1990s to the mid-2000s and later, iGen is the first generation to spend their entire adolescence in the age of the smartphone. With social media and texting replacing other activities, iGen spends less time with their friends in person--perhaps why they are experiencing unprecedented levels of anxiety, depression, and loneliness. But technology is not the only thing that makes iGen distinct from every generation before them; they are also different in how they spend their time, how they behave, and in their attitudes toward religion, sexuality, and politics. They socialize in completely new ways, reject once sacred social taboos, and want different things from their lives and careers. More than previous generations, they are obsessed with safety, focused on tolerance, and have no patience for inequality. iGen is also growing up more slowly than previous generations: eighteen-year-olds look and act like fifteen-year-olds used to. As this new group of young people grows into adulthood, we all need to understand them: Friends and family need to look out for them; businesses must figure out how to recruit them and sell to them; colleges and universities must know how to educate and guide them. And members of iGen also need to understand themselves as they communicate with their elders and explain their views to their older peers. Because where iGen goes, so goes our nation--and the world.

Growing Up Online

FRONTLINE examines the very public private worlds that kids are creating online, raising important questions about how the Internet is transforming childhood. Not so long ago, the digital world was the province of adults, business, and the world of work. Today, there is a very definite teen cyberculture, developed by kids who are growing up online. This digital world provides a private space, where kids communicate with their friends, do schoolwork, and also face the dangers posed by predators and cyberbullies. The Internet is forging a society with fundamentally different properties, leaving parents grapple with the question of how to manage kids interactions with a world where the partition between public and private has effectively disappeared.

UnSelfie

Bestselling author Michele Borba offers a 9-step program to help parents cultivate empathy in children, from birth to young adulthood--and explains why developing a healthy sense of empathy is a key predictor of which kids will thrive and succeed in the future. Is the Selfie Syndrome Undermining Our Kids' Future? Teens today are 40 percent less empathetic than they were thirty years ago. Why is a lack of empathy--which goes hand-in-hand with the self-absorption epidemic Dr. Michele Borba calls the Selfie Syndrome--so dangerous? First, it hurts kids' academic performance and leads to bullying behaviors. Also, it correlates with more cheating and less resilience. And once children grow up, a lack of empathy hampers their ability to collaborate, innovate, and problem-solve--all must-have skills for the global economy. In UnSelfie Dr. Borba pinpoints the forces causing the empathy crisis and shares a revolutionary, researched-based, 9-step plan for reversing it. Readers will learn: -Why discipline approaches like spanking, yelling, and even time-out can squelch empathy -How lavish praise inflates kids' egos and keeps them locked in "selfie" mode -Why reading makes kids smarter and kinder -How to help kids be Upstanders--not bystanders--in the face of bullying -Why self-control is a better predictor of wealth, health, and happiness than grades or IQ -Why the right mix of structured extracurricular activities and free play is key for teaching collaboration -How to ignite a Kindness Revolution in your kids and community The good news? Empathy is a trait that can be taught and nurtured. Dr. Borba offers a framework for parenting that yields the results we all want: successful, happy kids who also are kind, moral, courageous, and resilient. UnSelfie is a blueprint for parents and educators who want to kids shift their focus from I, me, and mine...to we, us, and ours.

The Dolphin Way: A Parent's Guide to Raising Healthy, Happy, and Motivated Kids--Without Turing into a Tiger

In this inspiring book, Harvard-trained child and adult psychiatrist and expert in human motivation Dr. Shimi Kang provides a guide to the art and science of inspiring children to develop their own internal drive and a lifelong love of learning. Drawing on the latest neuroscience and behavioral research, Dr. Kang shows why pushy “tiger parents” and permissive “jellyfish parents” actually hinder self-motivation. She proposes a powerful new parenting model: the intelligent, joyful, playful, highly social dolphin. Dolphin parents focus on maintaining balance in their children’s lives to gently yet authoritatively guide them toward lasting health, happiness, and success. As the medical director for Child and Youth Mental Health community programs in Vancouver, British Columbia, Dr. Kang has witnessed firsthand the consequences of parental pressure: anxiety disorders, high stress levels, suicides, and addictions. As the mother of three children and as the daughter of immigrant parents who struggled to give their children the “best” in life—Dr. Kang’s mother could not read and her father taught her math while they drove around in his taxicab—Dr. Kang argues that often the simplest “benefits” we give our children are the most valuable. By trusting our deepest intuitions about what is best for our kids, we will in turn allow them to develop key dolphin traits to enable them to thrive in an increasingly complex world: adaptability, community-mindedness, creativity, and critical thinking. Life is a journey through ever-changing waters, and dolphin parents know that the most valuable help we can give our children is to assist them in developing their own inner compass. Combining irrefutable science with unforgettable real-life stories, The Dolphin Way walks readers through Dr. Kang’s four-part method for cultivating self-motivation. The book makes a powerful case that we are not forced to choose between being permissive or controlling. The third option—the option that will prepare our kids for success in a future that will require adaptability—is the dolphin way.